Oct 242016
 
carrier-of-the-light

Whew… It has been quite the emotional few weeks here in the Allen household.  Life hits you hard sometimes, and you just have to roll with the punches and let those emotions wash over you.

I’ve been extremely overwhelmed with life lately.  Being a mama and wife has its challenges, and you go through phases that are a bit harder than others.  Over the past few months, I’ve felt extremely imbalanced.  Things seem to go wrong at every turn, and I find myself exasperated, whispering phrases like “I just hate everything” and “I can’t do this anymore” or “I just need a break”.  As an educator and wanna-be life-coach, I know that self-talk like this can be detrimental to the reality you experience.  In fact, it’s about the worst thing you can do and will bring negative experiences into your life.

When a self-help educator and life-coach feels like the world is crumbling around them and they have no idea what they’re doing, they kind of feel like a fake, a hypocrite.  When I get into bad moods like this, my husband always asks me, “If you were your client, what would you say to get through this situation?  What changes would you say need to take place to improve things?”  And normally that’s when I kick myself in the butt and snap out of it.

So now, after a tumultuous few weeks and knowing that there are still some challenging times ahead, it’s time to answer those questions, kick myself in the butt, find my center, and snap out of it.

Back when I first started blogging and taking this Soliloquy stuff seriously, I created a set of affirmations that I said to myself to remind me of my Divine power, protection, and purpose.  I also created a 10-15 minute yoga routine that I did every night before bed, and I had a habit of walking my dogs 20-30 minutes almost every day.  (Habit = I kinda had to since I lived in 700sqft with a husband, two kids, two dogs, and no fenced yard…)  I did this habitually for about two years.  I was also eating a lot of raw organic veggies, had fast food maybe a handful of times a year, and avoided soda.  I lost a ton of weight, was extremely toned, had plenty of energy, and felt the happiest I had in a while.  And you know what I manifested over that year or two?  My dream job and a baby that I’d waited over three years for.

I’ve since strayed away from all those good habits and routines.  I still live a pretty healthy life, but currently, there is plenty of room for improvement.  I feel so completely imbalanced that I need to find my foundation, my core, my center.  I need to remind myself of who I really am, deep down.  I need to find my gratitude and bliss, and I need to create space to nurture my heart and soul.  So back to the basics we go.

I’m kind of glad for this.  As some of you know, I’ve been writing a book.  I like to think of it as a cross between a devotional and a self-help book.  I wanted to create something that would help people build these sorts of habits into their own lives so that they can experience the sort of happiness and success that their souls are craving.  So by forcing myself to go back to the basics in my own life, I can start that process all over again to help guide others in theirs.

I believe in the power of our words and thoughts.  Various belief systems and sages throughout the years have emphasized such.  Therefore, the most basic foundation we can return to is this idea of positive self-talk – making sure that when we talk to ourselves, we do so lovingly and positively.  Do I really “hate everything” like I’d say to myself when exasperated?  No, of course not.  But the more I tell myself that, the more I’ll experience things that make me feel that way.  Despite any unfavorable circumstances that may surround us, we still can find something to be grateful for.  It’s important to find what it is that gives you that sense of peace that will help you return to a more positive state of being, despite what may be crumbling around you.

The first thing I do when I have to get back to the basics like this is that I remind myself of those affirmations I created so many years ago, those ultimate truths I know to be true that I should be telling myself and instilling into my psyche each and every day.

“I am a carrier of the light.  All that I think, say, and do expresses Divinity.”

“Nothing can keep my good from me.  I Divinely deserve that good, so I bless all situations in my life as good, good, GOOD!”

“All of my needs are met and exceeded so I may share with those who need it.”

“I am grateful for the endless abundance of the Universe.”

“Divine order is at work in my life.”

If you’re feeling stuck, overwhelmed, bogged down, or just like shit, give these a try yourself.  Allow yourself some space to sit quietly and take some deep breaths.  I normally repeat each one three times, out loud to myself, and I take a deep breath between each one.  May we all return back to our center and our most healthful selves.

Love and Light,

~Kim

 

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